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To the armed lunatics marching around the state capitol:

Wear a mask, you stupid morons!

Yes, I get it. You believe the second amendment gives you the absolute right to carry a loaded gun wherever you want. I’m not going to argue that point. If you want to play soldier go right ahead. Fill up the biggest stadium you can find. Invite your friends. Spend hours comparing the size of your guns and the caliper of their discharge. Parade around in your best camouflage t-shirts. Throw in some bling, because nothing says defender of freedom and democracy like confederate flags and NAZI swastikas. Have all the fun you want! Sneeze on each other. Cough on each other. Fart in each other’s faces for all I care.

But, if you want to hang out with the rest of us…